Take for example Gezer Hostels. It’s for girls only. In this day and age, a girl’s only hostel for campus students. What’s the goal? To stop guys from ahem..twoxing? I did not add that they are allowed visitors, only that the visitors can’t stay overnight. Curfew is at 11pm. I have no idea what they intend to achieve, since anything that can be done in the night can still be done during the day, if you know what I mean. Even female girlfriends can’t sleep over, I have to ask for permission and you have no idea how much pride I have to swallow it almost chokes me, because at the back of my mind I am screaming : Why? Why the f@#$ can’t I sleep over? My pal pays rent, right? Security issues my ass. Do I look like a thief? Si I can still steal during the day, do I have to do it overnight? Do I look like am going to rape anyone? Gimme a break. But outside is this plastic smile and apologetic expression: “Please matron, leo tu, hata hakuna mtu atajua….”
There are hostels and rentals if you want to stay out of campus. Hostels are run just like those in school. You get a room with a bed and mattress, a chair, a table and a wardrobe if you are lucky. There are singles, doubles and quartets. Prices vary depending on the level of security, availability of a generator or just how classy your hostel is. Prices vary from 3 to 5K for a single, 2 to 4K a double, or 2K (I don’t know any less) for a room of four.
The thing with hostels is they have rules. Your visitors have to have ID. You cannot have visitors past nine in some, visitors cannot sleep over, no cooking in the rooms, no ironing, no alcohol (ha!) and thousands of others. That is because in the hostels, you do not have water or electricity bills. So there is the tendency to waste that and the management, in an effort to maximize profit might cut the water in the late and wee hours of the day.
Rentals are much like where Archer described he is living. Probably one bedroomed, though you can get two or more bedrooms. In these, you furnish them yourself, and invite 10 other friends so you can share the rent and other utility bills. Ten may be an exaggeration, but you want to cut costs. You can cook, invite friends over, in short they are just like the usual houses..though the rent is inflated because of the student population. Best of all, no rules! Oh, you can bribe the watchie if your visitor needs to leave ID and doesn’t have one. My friend Ed gives the watchie gauge. It helps to have an alcoholic watchie.
Speaking of bribing watchies, after being in the hostels for some time, they get to relax and you can talk them into helping you break some rules. There is this time I went to see my pal at some hostels called Straight. You see with dudes, you can wink conspiratorially at the watchie if you are bringing a chick visitor. The wink that says “leo nitazikamata.” Then the watchie gives a thumbed up sign and grins wickedly. I wonder if they talk about their conquests with him, never mind the chicks were just coming to watch a movie and otherwise would have nothing to do with you. So when you are leaving in the morning after having marathon watched movies till 7am, your appearance is no different from the one who has been up to some bodily action. Damn, I hate the look the watchie throws at you as you leave. But thank God you can do with many of those since it doesn’t matter what he thinks anyway; he’ll never be a `potential’ in heaven or on earth! A potential as in potential mate. However, I do not make it a habit of making myself the object of the watchie’s source of gossip and speculation.
I have another friend whose sitting room must be close to Archie’s house (the last time he had one sofa). There is only one chair and table, though he lives with three of his friends. The floor does it when you want to sit down. Some people get so comfortable in their houses, particularly if they are living alone, and might retain their houses when they graduate.
Living outside might spare one of the problems associated with exiling, but you compromise on some things like security. For one, the hostel might get broken into, though this is rare. Mostly, you’ll be mugged as you walk to your place late in the night. There are many reasons that can keep you in school late, academic ones. Could be you were using the studio, the library or in a study group. Also, when you are in school, you are seconds away from cheap meals in the mess, and minutes away from the classrooms, so you can wake up at the last possible minute.
Filed under: True Stories |